Stoke Your Fire, Pursuing Your Passion

Do you wake up every morning dreading the alarm clock? Are you one of those people who push snooze a million times before you actually drag yourself out of bed to face the day? Are your mornings filled with getting ready, getting stuck in rush-hour traffic, and nervously sliding into work five to fifteen minutes late on a regular basis?

If that sounds like you, you should know that you are suffering from Workplace Brainwashing. The definition of brainwashing is when someone has convinced to do something repetitively without your even being conscious that you are doing it anymore. Think about your daily routine. Do you put your own passions on the back-burner every day to further someone else's dream?

A passion or a talent is just like a fire, burning deep within you. And like a fire, passion can dwindle, fizzle, fade, and die out if it isn't stoked each and every day. How do you stoke your fire? You need to be sure that just as you are dedicated and committed to going to work for someone else each day, you commit to spending time feeding your own fire, as well.

If you're a writer, commit yourself to writing at least one paragraph a day, whether you feel like it or not. If you're a singer, why not upload a YouTube video of you singing your favorite songs each day? You'd be surprised how motivated you can get if you just pursue your passion consistently each day.

There is nothing wrong with working a 9-5 job to feed your family. Just don't allow that job to steal way your passion. It is possible to do both. Remember that we devote our time to what we perceive to be important. Start making YOURSELF important again.

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The Joys of Being a Business Owner vs Being Self-Employed

Many people dream of one day "owning their own business", getting out of the rat race, and pursuing their own dreams. If you don't want this to be a "pie-in-the-sky" idea, you've got to do some serious planning and research before stepping out into the wide world of entrepreneurship!

Too often, our idea of owning our own business is vague. It's broad and unspecific. You just know that you need to stop clocking in, having someone look over your shoulder every five minutes, and coming up with excuses to call in sick because you hate what you do every day. In order to bring this fantasy into reality, you should have a pretty clear picture of what it is that you want to accomplish by having your own business.

Would you like financial security? What does that mean to you? Does that mean making $1,000 a month, $10,000 a month, or $100,000 a month? Are you looking to be an authority figure, managing others to work under you, or do you enjoy working alone? Do you picture your business having a storefront, or would you rather work from home?

Those are just a few of the questions you should start out with, but I suggest that you also think about whether or not you would like to be self-employed or a true business owner. You may be confused at that statement. Don't be. Watch my latest video to get a better understanding of what it means to be a true business owner versus being someone who is simply self-employed. This is a big decision for you to make, but it will be the foundation and the building blocks to your ultimate success.

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How to Make Money by Simply Being YOU!

A wise person once told me: "Don't ever forget that just because you can do all of these things with ease, and it comes naturally to you, that doesn't take away the value of what you do. Not everyone can do what you do." It took me a long time to figure out what my friend was telling me. Now I understand, and that knowledge is making me money each and every day.

You see, I have been a writer since I can remember. I recall my father placing me in front of a brand new Commodore 64 computer when I was five years old. He loaded up a game called "Kid Write", and I started writing children's stories. That's right. At the age of five, I was already writing, and I haven't stopped since. Writing is a natural talent that I possess, and it is as much a part of me as the color of my eyes or the fingerprint on the end of my finger.

Since I can knock out ten pages worth of material on pretty much any topic that you give me and make it relatable to the masses, I tend to think that this isn't a huge feat. What my friend was trying to get me to see was this: "Naiomi! You can do that because you have the talent and skills! Not everyone has that! So, don't short-change yourself when people ask you to do that for them." I'll admit that he had to tell me that more than twice.

Since quitting my high-paying corporate job as a licensed banker for one of the largest financial institutions in the world, I have learned many things about how to be a truly independent entrepreneur in today's economy. I'll tell you what I tell anyone who asks me how I became so successful. This may not be everyone's recipe for success, but it sure is mine.

Think about the top five things that you love and are able to do. These should be things that you feel DEFINE you. If you only like to dabble in painting every once in awhile, that is not what I'm talking about. Think about the things that make you YOU. If you took those things away from you, you wouldn't be the same. For me, the list looks something like this:

1. Writing
2. Speaking in Public
3. Poetry
4. Performing/Acting
5. Giving Advice to Friends

I like to call the next step The M&M Strategy. No, I'm not talking about candy here. You have to take those things, and find ways to MARKET and MONETIZE them. In other words, let people know that you are good at those things, and find ways to get people to pay you for doing them.

This is why I now get paid to travel the country and give seminars and speeches about what I do. (That's #2 and #5!) That is also why I am a published author of two books that have done very well in the marketplace. (Hmmm... #1!) It's the reason that I do performances, reciting Spoken Word poetry in locations all over the nation. (You got it, #2, #3, and #4!) Finally, it is why I created , a place where I can write eBooks giving advice on different subjects, create videos to answer advice questions, and post my blogs and other articles. (Are you keeping up, here? That was #5 in action.)

Always remember that just because you are good at these things, and they come naturally to you, doesn't mean that they are any less valuable. You too can find ways to make money by simply being you. Take some time to think about what defines you, apply the M&M Strategy to your own talents, and watch the money come rolling in!

Tell Your Partner Your Deepest Fantasies!

I'm always fascinated by the fact that so many men and women feel embarrassed by their own sexual fantasies. So much so, that they don't even feel comfortable telling their partner about the things they daydream about. These same people feel compelled to tell me their deepest darkest secrets after listening to my erotic Spoken Word CD, How Nasty is Too Nasty, or reading one of my steamy books, because they are sure that I won't judge them.

If you have ever developed an urge to experiment in the bedroom with your mate, spouse, or significant other, it's a shame for you to withhold this information from them. You have no idea whether they have had the same thoughts as you have. Open lines of communication apply to everything in a relationship, not just being faithful and expressing your feelings. You should be just as determined to be open about your sexual fantasies, too.

Keeping the fire alive in your relationship is up to you. It's your responsibility to let your partner know what is in your heart and on your mind. There's a reason why you ended up with this person. They should hopefully love you for who you are - including your naughty inner imaginings! Open up and let them in on your sexy secret yearnings... who knows where your revelation will lead. With Valentine's Day right around the corner, it's the perfect timing to tell them how you feel. Take the first steps to spice up your life today!

"I Hate My Job!"... and Other Self-Defeating Thoughts and Comments.

Anyone who has ever worked with me in the past knows one thing about me - I rarely complain about the place that I am employed. I will throw myself into my work and make the best of any situation. The outlook that I have always had has been that if you are unhappy with your present position, instead of spreading a negative cancer throughout the organization, you should quit and make room for someone else who would be happy to replace you.

I believe that this outlook is what has garnered me such success as a business owner. It is those of us who were able to work happily serving others who do the best when we are put in positions of responsibility for ourselves. My positive perception of reality caused me to take ownership over my position in life. It was only by my own doing that I was placed in the jobs that I had taken, therefore it was no one's fault but my own if I was unhappy. No one is forcing you to stay at a place of business that annoys you. The fact that you are still there says more about you than the establishment.

As a business owner, I appreciate the complexities that come along with hiring others to share your vision. You compensate them monetarily, but if they don't have the respect for your craft that you do, and the right attitude, they may not ever be the right fit. I am in a unique position. Most of the people that I employ are people who I have known personally for quite awhile. One steadfast rule that I have in not only my professional life, but also my personal life, is that I do not tolerate negativity or a complaining nature to remain around me. You are known by the company that you keep, and I don't have the time nor the inclination to deal with people who feel helpless in the world.

That's what being negative and always complaining really is, you know. It is an obvious result of a person who feels completely and utterly helpless in their life. Think about it. If you felt empowered and able to make meaningful decisions to impact your life, you wouldn't sit around bitching and complaining about what is happening around you. You would DO SOMETHING to change it.

There are even some people who will do things to try to change their life, but they maintain a self-defeating attitude all the while. As long as you refuse to let go of negativity, it doesn't matter what you do to try to succeed. You will never be happy. Success is not reached at the end of your destination, it is found during the journey towards it.

What Your Banker Never Told You - How to Improve Your Credit

Is your bank taking advantage of you? Most of us go to the bank at least twice a month for one reason or another. If someone were to ask you today, "What is your banker's name?", what would you say? Would you stare at them, dumbfounded? Too many people are utilizing the banks convenience services (direct deposit, savings accounts, automatic bill pay), but not taking advantage of all of the benefits that are offered through their financial institution.

As a formerly licensed banker at one of the world's largest banks, I will tell you that I discovered the injustice that occurs in America's banking system firsthand. The bank gains accounts and makes money off of service charges, insufficient funds fees, and more, but very few of their most loyal customers enjoy the most basic benefits that should be offered readily.

If you have a bank account, you should have a personal banker.

There should be someone that you speak to and are on a first-name basis with, in the branch that you frequent the most. This person should know you, your business/employer, your family, and your future plans. That is the only way that they will be able to help you when you need it. Your bank shouldn't be some huge, faceless institution that has no personality. Go into your bank this week and choose your own personal banker today! Most bankers would love to have their clients come in and request a meeting. It's a chore to try to get people to come into the bank nowadays, with online banking and drive-thru's being the main way that people handle their finances.

Make sure your banker is someone you feel comfortable with.

Since you will be revealing a lot about yourself and your family to this person, make sure it is someone that you feel comfortable with. He or she should be someone you can easily relate to, and someone that you know will not judge you when you hit those financial rough spots. A good banker can be your closest friend during those timesof need.

Don't think that you have to be rich to talk to your banker.

Your banker has tons of helpful tips and tricks to help you. Even if you are living paycheck to paycheck, you will be surprised at how much your banker can save you. There are easy things that you can do to improve your credit, and only your banker knows! In our new book, "What Your Banker NEVER Told You!", we reveal simple ways to improve your credit.

There is no reason why your bank should be taking all of your deposits and not helping to better your life. Think about all of the money you are entrusting your bank to manage for you. Use your banker to his or her fullest, and get started on the road to financial happiness today!

Full Disclosure: Honesty and Communication in Relationships

We've all told our partner that we wanted them to be honest and upfront with us. We encourage our loved one to open up to us and reveal all of their innermost thoughts without fear of judgement. I think that at times, we don't realize what sort of Pandora's Box we may be opening up when we ask for this 'full disclosure' from our mates. Feelings of hurt, disgust, disappointment, and even anger can erupt, and once it's been said, it can't be taken back.

Are there certain things that you have kept from your love interest? Would you ever think about revealing all of your past indiscretions to the one that you care about the most? If your partner were to tell you something that you found dispicable or distasteful, would you be able to process the revelation without punishing them for their past mistakes?

We have to be able to look at ourselves honestly and think about what we are willing to deal with in our relationships. Do we really need to know everything about the one we have given our heart to? Maybe we are better left in the dark about certain things. All of us have done things in our past that we aren't proud of. If we could snoop around in everyone's closets and dig up all of those dusty skeletons, we'd probably be shocked at all of the dirt we could find on each other! Why would we want to do that? Mistakes are made in our lives in order to help us learn and grow. We improve and excel above those mistakes, so why should we be made to expose them and have our faces rubbed in the mess we've made?

Take care when you are thinking about telling your love interest about all of your past experiences. You never know how they will react to your revelations. Also, if your partner tells you something that disappoints you, focus on the fact that they were secure enough in your relationship to tell you this embarrassing fact. Is your love strong enough to endure the negative feelings that their confession has caused within you? Full disclosure is a tricky subject. There may be some things that are better left unsaid.